How to tell someone to stop contacting you (with examples)

The situation

An ex, a former friend, a relative or someone you barely know keeps contacting you. You want it to end cleanly, without a fight and without leaving the door open.

What a good "stop" message does

• Says clearly that you want no further contact.
• Covers every channel: phone, text, social media and in person.
• Gives no reasons to argue with.
• Doesn't invite a reply.
• Is calm enough that you'd be comfortable with a police officer or judge reading it.

Example messages

• Clear and final: "Please don't contact me again, by phone, text, social media or in person. I won't respond to further messages."
• When there are logistics: "I don't want any further contact except about [returning your belongings / the shared lease]. For that, email me at [address]. I won't respond to anything else."
• Record-ready: "On [date] I asked you to stop contacting me. You've contacted me [number] times since. Do not contact me again. If you do, I'll report it to the police."
• For someone you'll still see (work, family): "I'm not willing to continue this conversation. Please stop messaging me about it. I'll be polite when we see each other."

After you send it

Don't reply again: not to apologies, not to anger, not to "can we just talk once." Each reply restarts the cycle. Save everything they send.

Mistakes to avoid

• Explaining why at length.
• Softening it with "maybe someday" or "I hope you're okay."
• Repeating the request every time they message.
• Responding to friends or relatives they send on their behalf.

When it doesn't stop

Follow our guide to harassment by text: keep records and report it. If you're afraid for your safety, contact emergency services or a support service.

Get help with your exact message

Resolve the Disputes writes a clear, calm no-contact message for your exact situation and tells you when the safest reply is none at all.